December4 , 2022

    Stupidity Not a Crime, But Consequences May Catch Up With You

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    Someone said, “It’s better to keep your mouth shut and appear dumb than it is to open it and remove all doubt.” Or, as Forest Gump’s mother said, “Stupid is as stupid does.” Sometimes, mental aptitude is demonstrated by the stupid things a person does.

    Take, for instance, dumb criminals. Last month, Glen Flory, Jr., entered a Bentleyville, PA, bank and approached a teller asking for a deposit slip. Flory allegedly wrote a note demanding money, and then signed his own name to the deposit slip. He fled the bank with more than $1300.

    Police had no trouble identifying him, tracking him down and arresting him.

    Several years ago, Timothy Chapek broke into Hillary MacKenzie’s house in Portland, OR, went into the bathroom and began taking a shower. Then he heard the homeowner return, so he locked the door and called 911 because he was afraid.

    “I just broke into a house, and the owners came home,” the intruder told the emergency operator. “I think they have guns.”

    The startled homeowner hollered, “Why are you in my house taking a shower?”

    “I’m sorry,” said Chapek.

    “Who are you?”

    “My name is Timothy Chapek.”

    “Why are you in my shower?”

    “I broke in.”

    Then MacKenzie said, “All right, then I’m calling the police.”

    The intruder said, “I’ve already called them. They’re on the phone right now.”

    Officers arrived at the house and arrested Chapek without incident. The police report said that Chapek is intelligent, “but conversation with him suggests mental issues of some sort.”

    Then there are the guys who leave a calling card at the scene.

    In Odgen, UT, a few Decembers ago, Cameron Hall broke into a car in the Day’s Inn parking lot and stole a GPS and some medication, but left his wallet in the car.

    The car owner turned it over to police, who were standing at the Day’s Inn front desk when Hall came back to ask if anybody had found his wallet. When confronted by officers, Hall admitted the break-in and still had the GPS in his possession.

    In Romulus, MI, a man attempted to rob a Marathon Gas Station, but the clerk pulled a gun, and the robber fled on foot. He left his vehicle in the parking lot with his driver’s license in it.

    In Colorado Springs, CO, a young man walked into the corner store with a shot-gun and demanded cash. The clerk put cash in a bag, but then the crook spotted a bottle of scotch behind the counter. He demanded the drink, also.

    The clerk refused and said he didn’t look 21. So the robber pulled out his wallet, took out his driver